The Tale of The Upsidedown Question Marks
by Serpentyna
Summary: Ok, I was bored...it was around Christmas...nothing in it is particularly true...ENJOY! I feel like a a microwave oven....EnJoY


This is called "The tale of the Upside Down Question Marks(?)"

It all started one day when my friends and I were walking down a dense, dark alleyway that was horrifically dirty so dirty there was dirt on top of dirt on top of dirt on top of slime…. But that has no relevance to the story…..or does it? Any way, Ava, Mel, and I were walking down this dense, dark, dirty alleyway on our way to school, which is strange because school is on the opposite side of the country, but anyway, we were walking down this dense, dark- Am I repeating myself….oops!. Let me start over….

Ava, Mel, and I were walking down this dark, dense, dirty alleyway on our way to school on early morning. We had all eaten a large bowl of sugar and were quite hyper on this particular day not just because of what happens shortly but because we were loaded with happiness…and sugar! As we were walking past a particularly dirty and rather large cardboard box, a scraggly little man jumps out of it, wearing a torn hat, a strange dirty jump suit and a pink bath robe over top of everything else, his shoes were the color of oranges and his teeth were a light moldy green color. He smelled really bad, but he looked as though he were in need of our…or someone else's….assistance.

After a short while of us standing there, staring at him with bewildered expressions on our faces, he coughed deeply and muttered something to himself.

" **Excuse me, sir, but what did you say?" Ava asked, cautiously stepping a little closer.**

"**Ava!" Mel whispered. " You shouldn't talk to-" **

But she was cut off as the man began to moan in the most distressed way, as if speech was something the came unwillingly to his lips. " I was just coming out of my house to see if my friend, Ron, was ever going to show up. You see I have been waiting for fifteen years. He told me to wait at the Stranded Alleyway, but I'm not sure he was ever very good with directions. He did fail his geography quiz at normal Mug-, I mean, at school… So, while I've waited for him, I've been making and selling these calendars. Oh, forgive me! We you…like to buy a calendar?"

He coughed once more in that same diseased manner and ducked down beneath them to crawl all the way into his…um, house and come out headfirst with three colorful calendars that looked as if they were written in Japanese. He gave us a tempting look as if the calendars contained some ever special magical powers, or something of the sort.

We examined them closely, then decided that they did not appeared diseased nor poisoned, so we took them gratefully out of his taped up hands and asked him how much, while rummaging through our purses to find our wallets.

" **Well, they are normally three dollars and fifty cents, which is how much a meal at McDonald's is, but you girls seem awfully nice…so you can have them for free. Oh, and these calendars are the new 2006 ones, so there the first ones of made of the year. Keep them safe and make sure you only look at the present month… or else." He waved us good-bye and bid us one more disturbing smile. **

We thanked him, and stuffed the small calendars into our backpacks. We were not quite sure of what he meant by his last statement, but they were sure he was just being mysterious.

As they approached the school building a bell rang… which we were sure was the bell for second period, because we did have to walk across the state. Mel, Ava, and I hurriedly signed in then raced to our lockers, trying to see who would succeed at entering the classroom first. I won, and cheerfully glanced around at my glaring classmates, who most didn't really like us very much, because we were too different for their taste. Mrs. Goodwin, of course, was not….thankfully. She was the kind of teacher that was just pleased you made it for her lesson, no matter how late you were.

Showing her pearly white teeth, she asked, " Okay, why were you late today?" You might think it frankly odd, when a teacher is this excited to find out what your alibi is, no matter how strange it is, because me and my friends were the strange clique at our school, I'm guessing, so she expects it out of us. I'd like to see what would happen if the Little Miss Perfects Sarah and Lexa had said some of the excuses we used….. Ha!

By this time, Ava and Mel had caught up to me. " Well, we were taking our not usual long cut to school this morning, when this guy living in his box sold us…well, gave us some calendars." We took them out of our backpacks and showed the class. " Ching Chang Chong!" we said, almost simultaneously, to which they gave us dirty looks.

Mrs. Goodwin laughed, however, and told us to take our seats so she could continue her lesson. Which, of course, we did, because what student wouldn't love Mrs. Goodwin.

Author: Ummm I'll be right back.. I have to take a short break… Alright I'm back…. Now where were we?

Oh yes, we took our seats and learned drastic pieces of information until lunch where high school students are allowed to leave campus and journey to the nearby fast food restaurants where they can eat and have fun for a whole hour until class resumes. We, of course traveled to Subway, don't ask question's or else Mel will have to stuff you in a trash bin and roll you down a hill, which is quite fun actually, but that's not the point. We quickly ordered and then hitch-hiked our way back over to the man who gave us the calendars… we had bought an extra sandwich and figured it would be nice to share our lunch period with him. We kind of knew we wouldn't make it back in time for science, but we don't really need science now do we? I mean everyone knows I'm not going to go out and become some dumb rocket scientist… stop laughing at me it wasn't that funny! Hey what is that supposed to mean? that's it! I'm done telling this story! Bye!

You really want me to? really? Fine! But not because you told me to! Anyway, we finally found the nasty alleyway we met the dirty little man, who gladly ate lunch with us; and he kept rambling on about how good we were and how we were going to be at the top of Santa's list this Christmas. We blushed because of course we were old enough to know that Santa Claus isn't real he's just make believe. Not wanting to make him feel bad or anything, we thanked him and sort of did that sweet little giggle girls do when they're all like, "awe, you're just saying that!" So, we finally found out what this dude's name was… um…I think he said Harry, but he coughed when he said it, so I don't really know.

We asked him if he wanted to walk back to school with us, we told him there were showers there and they would go get clothes for him at the local Bealles Outlet. So, we snuck him into the school without being seen, because class had already started. While he was getting showered off in the guys' locker room, we ran across the street and down a block to the near outlet store and got a pair of cheap jeans and a shirt with gloves and a jacket, we also got him a new baseball hat, and sneakers, to replace his hideous orange ones. He was much gracious of all the kindness we were showing him and after he was all clean and smelled half way decent, he looked rather handsome for an old guy, and he had an odd twinkle in his eye. Not a mysterious one, but a, sort of, I don't know how to explain it. It's the sort of twinkle that makes you feel special and warm inside, like when you really like someone and you know that you will have them in your life forever, like you've got a friend that you've met before, maybe you've seen their face somewhere before like at the grocery store, and you have finally met them.

Anyway, he thanked us and asked that we go back to see him again, and when we did he would have a surprise for us. But, Christmas was, of course, coming and they didn't get the chance to go see him until Christmas Eve. They made the long short cut down his alleyway, but as they drew closer to where they had met them, they swore that they were in the wrong alleyway, because this one was clean and the dark graffiti on the wall had been covered up in fresh paint that was a bright red color. Christmas lights were strung on the walls and the windows of the vacant apartments that lay on either side of the alleyway. The cardboard box where the man supposedly lived looked the same, except it looked as if it had been given a good rub-down. There was a note taped to the top of it. Written in fancy, curvy script was this message:

To my beloved friends,

I am very sorry that I couldn't stay to greet you, but I get really busy this time of year, you know being who I am. I am sure you have already figured out who I am, but if you haven't simply climb into my box and you will uncover a great many of my very few secrets.

Your friend,

Harry (a. k. a.) Santa Claus  
_P. S. Ron finally arrived…_

We gasped and cried out together, " Santa Claus?" We, anxiously climbed into the box with me entering first. As we entered, the world brightened as if I were stepping into the sun. But the bright glow dimmed slightly as I stood up, and gasped. " Oh, this can't be!" I said, for I was staring at the North Pole, exactly how I had pictured it… A huge castle and next to it a barn and on the opposite side of the castle, a rather large building which was , of course, the work shop. A voice behind me made me jump.

" **You like it? I built it myself!" A turned around quickly, expecting to see a cardboard box. But, instead saw a handsome, thin, (clean) man with a clean-shaven face (that means no beard), wearing a fuzzy red suit with white fluffy trimming and a hat and boots. He laughed at the stunned look on my face. I had so many questions, but asked, " Are my friends coming soon?" **

Santa motioned towards the small hill of snow he was leaning against. It was in the exact place the cardboard box should have been. " See for yourself…" he said as my friends popped out with a bright flash of light. I hugged them so tight, but they probably didn't see who I was, I thought as I recalled seeing the bright light for a few seconds as I came out. I pointed behind them to show them who was accompanying them. They gasped and Ava stretched out her hand to touch him. Santa giggled as she touched his slim belly. She gasped again and blinked,

" **You're really….._him_!" she said, excited her eyes wide. **

Santa laughed again, and told us that he was now going to take them to the toyshop so we could have a conversation about the last few weeks. We entered the short wide double doors, that were the entrance to the large building I told you of before, and a large sound of hurrying back and forth and talking and singing and music filled the air. It was a wonderful sound. But it didn't last for long. The short little people soon stopped what they were doing to look up and stare at the newcomers. We walked through the center of the large room between the two large tables that extended from the front double doors to the back double doors where we exited. As the doors swung shut the noise faintly started up again. The room we were currently in was very much smaller than the one we just left. There was a small round table and wooden chairs were placed around it. A bouquet was centered in the middle of the table. We stood there as Santa made his way to the opposite end of the table and sat down.

Santa folded his hands on the table and told us to sit down. We did. " Now, I do believe you have a great deal of questions to ask me? Well, there is a time and a place. This is not the place. But I will explain most of your questions with my next few statements. First off let's get some nourishment. Are you in need?"

Somewhat confused, we nodded.

Santa went on. "Well, someone is on their way right now, " he said as a particularly small elf entered the room and set down a plate of tea and sandwiches on the table, his gaze never leaving ours. " Thank you, Damien. Where was I? Oh, yes. You have probably figured this out already, but my name is Harry, Harry Potter."

I gasped. This was too unbelievable! How was Harry Potter Santa Claus?

" **You see all of the past Santa Clauses have been wizards. How else would we get all of the presents to good little girls and boys in one night? Why, without a time turner, some of us we probably be so stressed, we'd murder ourselves. But that is not important. I have come to explain that I am Santa Claus and that is what is important."**

" **But, who was the last Santa?" Ava asked.**

" **Simple, the last Santa was-"**

"**Albus Dumbledore!" I cried out unable to keep quiet any longer.**

" **Precisely," Santa said.**

"**But, why are you so old? J.K. Rowling hasn't even finished your seventh year at Hogwarts yet?" asked Mel, who had been keeping quiet for quite sometime now.**

"**My dear girl, don't you get it? J.K. Rowling is only writing about what happened in the past, those books happened more than fifty years ago!" **

This last comment was followed by a flood of questions. "What happened to Voldemort?", "Did Dumbledore plan his own murder with Snape?", and " Is Draco still hot?". But most importantly, " What became of Sirius Black?"

" **As I said before… there is a time and a place for questions. This is not the place. Now down to more important matters… What do you want for Christmas?" **

NARRATOR : SAMI, AVA, AND MEL got that strange twinkle in their eyes as they looked at each other and told Santa want they wanted, to which Santa laughed and said, "I'll see what I can do." He gave us some Floo Powder and we poofed into Mel's fireplace ( she was the only one with a fireplace).

Sami awoke the next morning and woke up her family, who raced her into the living room under the tree was a ton of present most addressed to Sam's brothers, Vincent and Phillip. SAM scanned the tree for a small box. She hurriedly opened it and a note fell out. She read it. In the same fancy handwriting was:

Dear Sami,

Which came first: the chicken or the egg?

Luv,

Harry Potter

Sami grew confuzzled and realized that a huge green question mark was now floating above her head. She grabbed it before it disappeared and flipped it upside-down, then flew out the door and down the rode to Mel's house, who came floating out on a purple question mark. " Yay!" she called. They both Floated further down the road towards Ava's house, who shouted to them on a blue question mark. " Hey! You got yours too!"

They all floated around for hours and hours, until Sami stopped.

" **What?" Ava asked.**

" **Something's missing…" she said, and as soon as she said this a very hot Daniel Radcliffe poofed next to her. **

"**Where the bloody hell am I?" he asked, but as soon as he saw Sami he stopped and grew helplessly in love. **

" **Oh yea!" Sami shouted and pulled down the magical curtain that was just floating above them as it is in every good fairy tale…. This story now ends in a long, endless kiss…..**


End file.
